If I hold out for the nebulous time of “More than 15 minutes” then maybe I will still get a ticket.

I still woke with a sense of twinkly-eyed optimism, mostly due to a dream I had last night which involved a series of strange, Hunger Games-styled survival tasks and resulted in a ticket that looked like virtual reality headset handed out by an old man working in a makeshift kiosk on a motorway roundabout near Slough.

Having spent some quality time lurking on the Radiohead Reddit forum in the past week, attempting to uncover some expert ticket booking tricks, I hoped that going using Ticketmaster and See Tickets might allow more chance; given the regularity with which these sites deal with mass ticket demand.

The statistics now seemed unlikely: tickets to Kate Bush’s 22 nights at Hammersmith Apollo sold out in 15 minutes.

U2’s 360° tour sold all of their 7.2m tickets within minutes.

The original piece stated that StubHub had sold Radiohead tickets at inflated prices, when the tickets had instead been listed.